You can put down a book or turn off a movie, but you can’t escape the news. It’s on every TV, gas station kiosk, and Windows search bar in the country.

Turkey? Dude, his name’s Laserbeak.

You and your lizard are awesome. He looks like a little alien—I’m glad E.T. found home.

During COVID, I went a bit mad and got really into collecting Transformers action figures. I’m still not entirely sure why. One day I just bought one on a whim, and before I knew it my closet was full of unopened, mint condition toy robots.

Anyway, Christmas rolls around and I see a flyer for a local toy drive. A sudden compulsion hit me, so I loaded up my entire stash and donated the lot. Just like that, the spell was broken. Not even Soundwave was spared.

To this day, nobody in my life knows that I spent thousands of dollars on plastic crack, only to foist my addiction on some poor, unsuspecting kids. I like to imagine the War for Cybertron rages on in their hearts.

Honestly, I’m not familiar enough with the world of faxing to know which apps are trustworthy, especially since the documents contained personal information. If I ever have to send another fax, I’ll consider it.

I recently had to fax a document to the government, which meant I had to print the thing, then pay $12 at OfficeMax to send it. Absolute bedlam.

Mullet with headlights?

B̶U̶T̶T̶E̶R̶FLY IN THE SKY

Treasure Planet was such a great movie