Yes, because I have experienced varying levels of prosperity myself, and because my dad’s family had money and my mom’s parents literally lived in a trailer.

Not sure that it influences my perspective, except that I have an urge to “be nice on the way up, so you don’t crash so hard on the way down”, and I feel comfortable in most places whether run down or opulent, and consider that an asset.

Ramsey Midwood, Feed my Monkey

Damn near every song by Joshua Ray Walker

Yannis and the Yaw, Clementine

Fancy Napkins!

I have a story about heat and flavor. Often the flavor and heat ARE intertwined, if you “cool” the pepper you mute the flavor.

So I make lentil salad sometimes, it’s one of those dishes so much better than it should be - cooked al dente lentils, jalapeno, onion, carrot in a dressing of olive oil, mustard, lemon. My little kids loved it but would whine that it was too spicy. So my older daughter graciously de-seeded and took out the ribs of the jalapenos when helping make it one time and

They whined because it didn’t taste as good. The flavor was contained in the spicier part of the pepper.

Not everything should be spicy but it’s good to have a tolerance because some flavors are in those spicy foods that simply aren’t in the mild versions.

I’m a lady and haven’t had any trouble here. The only place I really notice how ridiculously male - skewed Lemmy is, is on the NSFW. That is definitely all “male gaze” stuff, with the occasional actual lesbian also posting stuff guys like. Even the posts OF men are FOR men, everything posted with some assumption only men are looking at the posts.

The other communities just aren’t so gendered, I don’t notice much whether someone seems to be one or the other, it isn’t relevant to cocktails or cooking or gardening or science fiction.

My mom and dad used to argue, or debate is probably a better word, about this.

My dad’s family was pretty well off and one of his great aunts had been a lawyer, toward the turn of the century (1900-1920ish) and he thought women could do anything men could, that there were NO social restrictions or any real discrimination that you couldn’t address by simply pointing it out and doing what you want. That women were just sort of brainwashed to think there were outside-imposed limits, society was not a strong force compared to individual will.

My mom’s family was poor, her grandma was a very accomplished farmer, midwife, had taken in men during the depression, put them to work on her farm, fed and housed them, but my mom’s mom was a wife, her husband beat her (but never my mom) and didn’t think she should have any life except in relation to him, she never did work outside the house and didn’t seem to have any opportunity to, my mom saw how social forces worked to keep her and other women down, she didn’t think women could just up and go do whatever, unless they had their own money and property like my dad’s aunts did.

I think the answer is between them, but mostly think the only thing you really have control over is yourself so what you do is the bigger factor. So I think people who feel like everything outside of them is holding them back - it’s unproductive even if true. You might not be able to address the victimizing factors, but how do you even know if you don’t try?

I think negativity in general sort of bugs me. One of my coworkers is so negative. Since she’s worked with us she’s dropped like 70 lb to reach a good weight, gotten her eyes fixed, had a grandchild, so much good she could celebrate but only she sees the bad, what is wrong not what is right!

As someone with kids, I wouldn’t have dated anyone seriously who didn’t have kids, and my now-husband says the same. It just isn’t likely to work out. Not impossible but in general parents do relate better to other parents, they understand you need time for the kids, and understand that’s not all you are, that you are also still a person with adult desires.

So you may get screened out BY the single parent.

Discreet and discrete from the kids hookups? Not the same criteria. Just attraction and compatibility. If it’s just spending some time together, that sort of dating, sure. I didn’t want those to go anywhere though. Just some relaxation and fun with others who were also in the same mindset. When I was ready to seriously date, those guys actually wanted to, but I didn’t think it would work out.

I guess I agree with the consensus here - if you WANT a ready made family because you want to raise kids but not procreate, sure go for it, just wanted to give you the view from the other side.

We had an A/P manager who chewed her way through 3 entire staffs before management decided the problem was actually her. Two of them collectively quit in a group on one day! That was the most outrageous I think. How did it take FIFTEEN people quitting because of her management before they fired her?

Also one manager who came in shitface drunk and swinging when she got fired. That was the most dramatic.

The fact that school kids have gotten so much nicer than when I was in school.

Crime dropping worldwide but particularly in my city.

And honestly? Plunging birth rates, even though I have a lot of kids and stepkids and love it. I do feel like it’s freedom mostly, people are more free to not have kids and it will keep the population from exploding.

My ex had long hair and wanted me to cut it, he pulled it over one shoulder and said “Cut it, just cut it here” and I said “no, it will be slanty” (because he had it pulled over to one side). He insisted, I shrugged and did it .

“IT’S SLANTY, WHAT DID YOU DO!”

You want broad sweeping categories? Maybe categorize by behaviour?

Crawlers Slitherers Swimmers Flyers Stationary creatures Sunlight eaters Carnivores Plant eaters Omnivores

I think decide what your groups actually are first, then label. So a fish in this list would be swimming carnivore.

That is what I’d do if I ever was divorced or widowed. If we can make it and retire I don’t want more kids, we raised so many. But it’s really the best work I’ve done. I would take in a couple more if I was single. Not babies, older kids. It’s hard though.

I’m a lady but have a kids living room (like we have a separate kids wing in our house just because of the way it was added to over the years before we bought it) and when the kids move out that is becoming a space like that. Absolutely a 1950s lounge for us. Pool table!

Our mayor is a lesbian who was chief of police. Conservative Democrat. We seem to flip between democrats, who improve the storm drains and try to do things to help citizens, then Republicans who are focused on superficial beautification of the city and paying businesses to come here. All have historically been in bed with developers and there hadn’t been much planning. It works ok.

Some of the “city” functions are run by the county not the city - education, transit, health. The county is much more backwards and conservative than the city. Those things are in much worse shape.

Yeah, it’s definitely an inexperience/lack of skill problem on my part. I know that because of how much I love manual shift cars. Anything with two wheels I am just trying to keep upright and point it in the right direction.

Enunciate!

I do think it’s the car drivers responsibility to watch for pedestrian and cyclist (I am all of these on different days) but my God yesterday during a storm a cyclist drove right through a red light into oncoming traffic right in front of the car in front of me. We desperately need more bike infrastructure here and also for bikers to not drive like they want to die.

I taught my kids to drive using an automatic transmission, then once they were good at handling traffic, and all the more difficult parts of driving I let whoever wanted to learn to drive my stick shift. But I personally feel safer, not less safe, when I have to pay attention to operating the car, and as things stand now, think it makes me a better driver - that may not matter once cars are more advanced but for now, with driver-operated cars, stick shift is the right level of engagement for me to not get distracted. I do hate shifting motorcycles though, because I am not as familiar with it and it makes me feel less safe. Which is how I imagine OP feels.

Monsoon Wedding

Lord of the Rings

Not picky about food, and open to new music.