Not getting to have “schooling”. I was “homeschooled”, in that my parents kept all 8 of us kids at home and didn’t bother to provide much in the way of education beyond reading and basic math. The lack of real education I was able to overcome, but the gross lack of any socialization has left me struggling with poor social competency to this day.

If she says she’s on birth control but you haven’t seen it, dont believe her. If she pressures you not to use a condom, don’t consent.

Don’t marry someone before you’ve known them well for a few years. Don’t ignore red flags, such as them telling you that they see other people as pawns or them pressuring you to empty your 401k to put it into their financial/realestate schemes.

If your partner doesn’t treat you with kindness and respect right now, then they are never going to, no matter how many times they say they will if you would only just do this or be that - nothing will ever be good enough for that kind of person, period, full stop. And, no, they won’t change, no matter how much you do, and no matter how much you love them.

Do learn what “love bombing” is. Then find out if someone is grossly irresponsible with money or hiding a severe alcohol problem before you move in with them.

There are a lot of people in this world who will take advantage of your kindness and naivety, if you let them, so be mindful of how people treat you and those around them before you make commitments to them.

Not everyone is awful.

Edit to add: don’t ignore your friends or family telling you that they think your relationship is unhealthy, or that the person is mistreating you or others, or may be taking advantage of you. Even if you don’t have much respect for the person telling you this, stop and listen and reflect, because red flags don’t stand out to you when you’re wearing rosy tinted glasses.

It’s a toss up between

1. R telling me she was on birth control, I guess thinking it’d keep me around if we had a kid, then when our kid was age 4 she said she had cancer and disappeared for several months. Turns out she never had cancer and just said that so I wouldn’t think poorly of her for abandoning her child to run off with a guy in another state. …Her child that she was barely present for anyway.
2. D getting me to empty my 401k to buy a house as an investment property for “our” retirement, only for her to keep it in the divorce. I could have pushed for it to be sold and gotten at least some of my money back, but she would have put up such a fight that I’d have spent in attorney’s fees as much as I would have won from the sale, so it wasn’t worth the fight to me, and she knew that.

What’d I learn from these? Not a whole lot, it turned out: my next relationship wasn’t much better. But at least I figured out to end that one before it got TOO too deep.

Sounds like it could be interesting to try snow biking. Doesn’t often snow here, and when it does it rarely sticks. Maybe 1-3 actual accumulations per year, so my gravel bike is suitable practically all the time. It’s just the cold that makes it unpleasant to me - layering when it’s 50F is fine, in the 40s F is doable if it’s sunny. Anything below that is just miserably uncomfortable to me because of cold wind to the face and the need to adjust layers as I warm up and cool down.

Got hired at the same time as another guy. Don’t recall why, but I was in my boss’s office when he decided it was time to assign us offices despite us being in training and not needing them for another few weeks, so he grabs his admin assistant and off we go to verify which offices were open / available. I got the one with a window.

I definitely feel better overall when I ride my bike regularly. My mood is better, I have more energy, and I sleep better. I got into it around the time I separated from my ex-wife, and I think it’s a significant part of what kept me from falling into a serious depression when I got divorced.

I hate running. I hate swimming. I hate lifting weights, or anything in a gym. Hiking is nice, with the right company. But I enjoy biking around my neighborhood and along the city greenways. I was wanting to be more active, healthier, etc. but couldn’t find anything I actually would stick with until I found an activity I actually enjoyed. Lately I’ve been feeling pretty down, getting uncomfortably close to a major depressive episode, but riding my bike for a while always makes me feel a bit better, at least while I’m doing it. I think not biking, due to it being winter, is indirectly part of why I’ve been down - I just haven’t been doing much that is enjoyable while dealing with a lot of stress including some major life changes.

Fwiw, I’m a psychiatric nurse. I’ve read the science news articles that say exercise is better than anything and the ones that say it doesn’t do much. I’ve also read some of the actual research/journal articles. The reality is that we’re not really certain how much difference it actually makes, but it probably depends on a variety of factors that vary from person to person and based on the type of exercise. We do know that people who are physically healthier also tend to feel better mentally. What I have seen personally, and experienced myself, is that exercise helps with mood, but it’s not a cure-all, and it’s not instant, and it makes a difference if it’s something you enjoy doing independently of it’s health benefits. Exercising outdoors, particularly in green spaces, probably also helps.

Where can I buy a pair? … No, seriously, I’d wear these.