They want my wife and children dead. If they are near my family, they pose an existential threat. I will leave saving the proverbial souls of neo Nazis to others. I am interested in establishing that my family is off limits and dangerous for them to so much as look at.

Would I throw a punch at a confirmed Nazi? Without hesitation.

Some people learn to shed the racism from their heart and become better people. Some will only get so far as keeping quiet because they are afraid. There will always be severely racist people. It is just as important that they feel unequivocally unwelcome as it is to change those who will change.

I care very much. Please read everything I wrote. The system is broken, and we need to fix it. In the meantime, since we must live within the broken system, it is wise to do a thorough cost/benefit analysis before accepting any job. Not everyone can do that, but some can.

We play pretty conservative baseball when it comes to personal finances. We have a smaller house further from the city than my wife’s peers at work. We buy cars that meet our needs, but our wants are frequently compromised in search of the lowest total cost of ownership. We make no major purchases without real research first. Our kids have not been to Disney, but they will hopefully be able to go to the college of their choice without a mountain of debt when the time comes.

We are very lucky, but most people that merch our income are not actually in as stable a place as we are. That stability comes from good decisions.

That is a good point. We are not paying monthly premiums. Again, over the years we have chosen our employers very carefully. To be clear, we are lucky to have been in the place to do so.

That said, we also did very well when I was a public high school teacher. The pay was awful, but the health insurance we had was better than my wife could get at most corporate jobs at the time. We now use my wife’s corporate benefits because my family’s needs have placed me as a stay-at-home dad for several years. Once she got in with a company that actually values its employees, we made the decision to stick it out.

I live in the US and was born here. This is true of my wife as well.

I hate to say it because I know how bad many people have it here, but our health care experiences have been excellent. IVF? We paid a few grand by the end of everything, but that’s it - most of the cost was one hormone in particular. My cancer that almost killed me? We paid $15 co-pays for doctor appointments and physical therapy appointments, nothing for any treatments (radiation, chemo, surgeries, hydration, etc.), and about $15 co-pays for each prescription medication. My upcoming rotator cuff surgery? I’ll pay similar to the cancer. Regular in-home therapy services for our children with special needs? Free.

This was not by accident or dumb luck. My wife and I have always chosen jobs in large part based on benefits in general and health insurance in particular. We may not make as much money on paper as job hoppers and those who chase the highest number on their paychecks. Do you know what we do have? No medical debt. Great parental leave. More vacation time than most. A legal plan that paid to set us up with every estate planning and life management document one could need.

So it’s hard. Our system is fucking broken - too many people cannot get the care they need, or they go into debt to get it. It needs to be fixed. That said, I also have friends who just made shitty choices. They actively chose direct income over benefits. They gambled and some of them lost.

We need to fix US healthcare in or much every way. In the meantime? My wife and I choose to play the game by the rules as they are currently written, and we play with intent to win.

I send Independence Day and to tell them it is a documentary. Now they know not to fuck with us.

Oh, I see your mistake. Those are Samsung fridges. Nothing has a shorter lifespan than a Samsung fridge. Since there are two they will die together to maximize the inconvenience factor, and they thus must be clicked simultaneously. That is the only way a fake Samsung fridge could mimic the frustration caused by a real one.

Before the election we will be preparing bugout bags for my nuclear family and establishing concrete plans to flee.

After the election, if Trump wins we will monitor and be ready. At the first sign of trouble we get out of dodge. I have the ability to get EU citizenship for my family if need be. In the meantime, my wife and I have skills that can get us the privilege to move into some countries based on their employment needs.

My family and I would have reasons to be targeted by white nationalists if they felt empowered. I have received semi-threatening letters from such people in the past.

I hate that we have to think this way, but we do.

Each kid and wifey could have individual Daddy/hubby attention at the same time. My yard and home would look immaculate because my ADHD task burnout could be overcome by calling in a new helper.

I could probably make bank and help improve the lot of humanity by allowing my duplicates to go through controlled medical and scientific testing.

At some point one of me would figure out how to leverage this ability for the absolute betterment of humankind. That would probably become a driving mission for the collective me at that point.

Generally, no, but it did last night. We had moved into a new house, and we were trying to tell Uber Eats which train station we were closest to so our delivery person could get off at that station before driving to our house.

We do not love near a train station. It was weird as dreams tend to be.

I am angry at how clever this is. Well done.

I use it almost daily, mostly for educational content. I really enjoy how much meaningful content people are producing there in easy-to-consume chunks.

I am also not surprised at how much the potential federal legislation in the US is getting characterized there as, “Ban TikTok.” As much as I enjoy the service, they are absolutely doing their best to spread their own misinformation.

The original Pizzaria Uno cream of broccoli soup from the 90s. It was maybe the perfect version of that soup.

Aaarugh! So you have any idea how many times I tried to force my phone to use the right word and still failed? I think my keyboard hates me.

This is a huge case of, “Yes, but . . . .”

Yes, exercise absolutely can and does help mental health. It helps me a great deal. That said, exercise requires some level of time, energy, and focus. The key is to find a form of exercise that you enjoy or at least do not mind. If going to the gym is exclusively a chore, you will more likely fail. If exercising brings some Internet inherent reward, you will more likely succeed.

I love lifting weights, but I did not have the mental energy to put together a program or figure out how to work around big physical issues after cancer. I paid a trainer to help, and that eliminated enough of the focus needed that going to the gym became fun. Now I am transferring to running my own program because I have learned enough that it is not as big of a mental load. Along the way my energy has also increased.

Contrast this with running. I hate running. It hurts my joints. It hurts my lungs. Getting outside and running should be easier than a trip to the gym, but it is actually much harder for me because there is no inherent reward. It just sucks, and it continues to suck as I get better at it.

So yeah, exercise is great for mental health, even if it is not a cure all. This only holds true once you find something you enjoy. If you think you enjoy nothing, you are most likely wrong. Keep looking. Keep trying. Maybe you like walking. Maybe you like a specific martial art. Maybe you like biking, but only on a stationary bike in your living room while binging your favorite shows.

Find something that you enjoy doing that fits well enough into your life. That way on the days you don’t want to start, you will anyway because you know it will be enjoyable once you are doing it.

I went through a period where I was under doctor’s orders to treat any fluid produced by my body as a biohazard. That meant any time I urinated I had to close the lid and flush twice. So yeah, there was no mellowing in that case.

Ooh, I actually know the answer to this! I had cancer a couple years ago, and it got really dicey for a bit. While my story has a good ending and I am now effectively cancer-free, I had to look the potential of death clear in the face and start making some concrete plans.

My answer is unequivocal - I would prepare my family for my untimely demise. My wife and I got together when we were young enough that we entered adulthood together and grew that way. There is no me and her - there is only us. This is not some creepy codependency thing. We just became adults whose emotional and mental shapes are highly complimentary. That happens when you are with someone longer than you were not. We also have kids for whom I am the primary caretaker and stay-at-home dad while she works. Both boys are autistic though you might not notice it, and I am their primary coregulator. My family needs me in ways that are not universally true across families.

Most of my plan can be summarized as follows:

• Prepare my wife for life without me. Ensure she has the basic skills that I have taken over in our lives. Impress upon her the notion that while she has been the love of my life, I sincerely hope I am but one of hers.
• Spend as much time with my kids as possible. Cement myself in their memories. Record messages and fatherly advice in writing and/or video for every major life event I can think of.
• Set up therapy and support services for my family once I die.
• Get my friends and family on board for specific forms of help as time goes on. People who want to help do nothing when they do not know what to do. They are more likely to follow through when told, “I know Jimmy really looks up to you. After I die, please take him out for some bonding time at least once a month. He is going to be lost without me, and Wife cannot be a masculine role model like I was.”
• Plan my funeral and write my obituary. Make it clear that any of this can be changed.
• Basically, do anything I can to prepare my family for life without me.

I know this is not terribly exciting, but it found that what I feared far more than death was the fate of my family without me there to care for them.

As a small child, I feared that humanity would go extinct. I knew the following:

• Species can go extinct, like the dinosaurs
• In many million years, the sun will expand to encompass the Earth
• If we do not invent interstellar travel before then, say goodbye to humanity like the dinosaurs.

I stayed up at night worrying about this. I was precocious in this very difficult way, and it was hard for my parents.

As a teen, this fear was somewhat replaced by an increased understanding of entropy and a fear of the eventual end of the universe.

As an adult, that fear has been somewhat replaced by an increased understanding of human nature and a fear that we will ruin ourselves before either other fear can come to pass.

Looking to the future, I see that my oldest wants to be an engineer for NASA and has the chops to pull that off of his interest maintains. My youngest compulsively helps people. Maybe there are enough people like the two I was blessed with. Maybe one day we can get off this rock and scatter like seeds on the wind. Maybe raising them right will be my small contribution to the continued success of humanity.

I use Lemmy for discussion and reading the thoughts of others, like I used to do with Reddit.

I am old enough that I can’t still use Facebook to check the lives of much of my friends and family. Discord is where I can chat with many of my younger friends.

YouTube gives me short video content for entertainment, and TikTok does the same for more serious topics.

I deep dive Wikipedia so regularly that my wife rightly insists we give at least $20 every time they ask for money.

I have a double basin sink with a strainer in each drain. I actually have two types of strainers depending on if I want to be able to plug the sink or not. Sometimes, things get by because it’s not like a strainer always stays 100% perfectly in place.