Save a slap for the dude who invented slaps!

Only tangentially related, but: I’m a school bus driver and a very popular name for kids these days is “Rhys”. I really enjoy asking them why they’re named after chocolate-covered peanut butter as it drives them crazy.

Put money in your 401k! Nothing else really matters as much.

Its pretty similar

No, that was the sequel.

Plot twist: Richard Gere was actually George Washington!

Pat’s

Lol you get assaulted just for going to Pat’s.

The real crime is the peppers - you’d get assaulted if you ordered those here in Philly.

Many places I worked the recent college grads were paid as much as (or more than) the senior developers, so this strategy didn’t work. They still did it, though.

Years ago I got a copy of MSDN which had apparently been put together by developers who all had giant monitors. On a normal laptop screen none of the text wrapped properly so every article had a horizontal scrollbar which you had to work left and right to read every fucking line. I eventually had to start copying the contents into a Notepad instance just to be able to read the damn things normally.

This is why I think developers should always have to work on 10-year-old laptops with 800x600 screens.

I don’t understand why they don’t just put “My” on it: MyMail, MyOutlook etc.

I solved this dilemma by quitting and becoming a school bus driver. Now I only have to worry about middle-schoolers threatening to shoot me.

Makes sense. Human beings don’t actually need proteins or fats.

There’s something I don’t understand that maybe other unicycle riders can explain to me. I can ride a unicycle and I can even juggle while riding one, but I cannot go more than 200 feet or so before my thighs completely burn out and I fall over. How do people use these things as actual forms of transportation?

it’s made from fucking grass!

I started making my own sourdough bread during COVID because for a while there they didn’t have bread or yeast at the grocery stores. I love the fact that the ingredients are just flour, water, salt and starter (which itself is just flour and water and the yeastie beasties). The yeast all dies during cooking and the water is essentially cooked out of it, so sourdough bread is really just flour altered into a really funky form with a bit of salt. I like the added thought that even the flour is just ground-up grass.

“So, how many polygons can we use to render this car in the game?”
“Uh … four?”

I feel the same sense of embarrassment for the driver that I would if I saw some guy masturbating in public.

covered in rust

The best thing about these “trucks” is that they all will be, eventually.

What shocked me the most was how much stupider it looked when surrounded by normal vehicles. It looks like a cheap prop from an early '70s sci-fi movie - I wouldn’t be at all surprised to see Sean Connery climb out of one wearing a codpiece while shouting “renew!”

The main similarity between Musk’s companies and MacDonald’s is that they both involve clowns.

I saw my first real Cybertruck in the wild the other day. It was absolutely incredible … how fucking stupid that thing looked.