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Cake day: September 28th, 2023

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  • Once I worked a double with a coworker I had a small crush on. Towards the end of the shift, my sister called me. She was staying in a rural area on the other side of the state. She had started to drive home, and something had popped her tire. She had no spare, and no where was open… and she had an international flight in the morning. I told her, yup yup, I’ll go get her.

    As soon as I got off my call, my co worker insisted that she go with me. “You’re going to need a co pilot.” After some back and forth, somehow we ended up taking her car even. That was at 8pm. It was really nice at first. I learned a lot about her. She told me about her fiance, and her upbringing in the south. We got to our destination at midnight, and both of us were bushed. We asked my sister if she could take the wheel for the way home. We both fell asleep.

    My sister hit a deer at around 2am. We were still about 90 min from my car. Who do you call at 2am to drive that far to turn around and drive all the way back? I started making calls. We were dropped off at this truck stop; I am trying to be strong for these ladies; one of whom just had her car totaled and one of whom is my literal baby sister. One of my friends made the drive; and Ive got stories about her (which also might just be movie esqe). In any case, I took my co worker home, and then handed my keys to my sister gingerly, because she had some stuff to do at her house before my dad took her to the air port. She made her flight with 20 minutes to spare, at 830 am. My car was the first one she left in working order that night.

    I spent the next month helping my coworker get around while my sister was abroad. Didn’t get the girl, but that’s the story of my life. This had stakes, and acts, and a second act turn!


  • I think its the larger double standard; men are sex monsters. A woman and a man can’t be friends. A child with a man is in danger.

    This is connected to; Intimacy is feminine. Men can only be vulnerable or gentle with their partners or families, if then. Its not universal, obviously, but the callous lover and the distant father are not so uncommon so as to be unrecognizable. Intimacy between men is also considered feminine, unless in the military or team sports.

    It’s a world we created as well. Every double standard listed in this thread is a double standard. But it is also something cultivated by the Patriarchy.








  • I guess it depends. My relationships never lasted terribly long, but I was kind of a slut in my 20s. I deleted all my socials during the pandemic. So in the spirit of the question, 5 years. At first I needed some time alone, but then it just kind of happened. I’m open to the idea, but loneliness is preferable to the casino that dating apps became. I’m in my 30s, single friends of friends are thin on the ground. I don’t even know where 30 year olds meet each other. I wish the library was open late. I do enjoy the single life. I sleep in every morning. I spend my money how I wish. But people don’t realize how touch starved you get. No sex won’t kill you, but no intimacy might. Its why dudes can’t distinguish between friendly and sexual contact; they get none of it, especially after their mom dies. I don’t know. A girlfriend would be nice.




  • I’m too young to remember Jackomania. In my politically moderate (by US standards) upbringing, he was the subject of many deeply racist, transphobic jokes, all juxtaposed with the child molestation thing. I dont really have any other memory of him, aside from the simpsons episode of him (made at the height of Jackomaia).

    That all being said, any expectations I have were set by Talking Simpsons, and the fact that that is the only episode not on Disney+. The episode was very much made at Jackson’s insistence. He had an unhealthy obsession with Bart Simpson, and the episode itself was made with his intention to lure more boys in. It was very much selling the fantasy of being plucked from obscurity by Jackson-as-sexless-music-elf, and you, a little boy, could stay up all night writing the next pop hit. A few of his victims even cited the episode, and one detail that stuck with me was that Jackson would invite boys over with their sisters, as cover.

    Jackson had a deeply traumatic upbringing in the public eye, and I cant imagine the fame or racism went down easy, especially when that venom was all he knew. But there is no doubt in my mind that he did molest little boys.