Can’t answer question directly. Just, when I was your age, there was so much I needed to learn. Every person takes time to figure things out, overcome shortcomings, work thru stuff.

At 21, lot to figure out, discover, learn. For me, cuz childhood abuse, trauma, autism, I was a mess. No idea how to have healthy relationships, positive communication, etc.

So, could be your dude is just young, figuring stuff out. Or could be something else. Only way to know is to ask, talk about it. No assumptions, no judgment. Communication is key.

Might be useful to research how to communicate effectively. How to talk about stuff in not about criticize, instead seeing other person’s viewpoint, meeting half way. Problem is, other person may not want to or be able to.

You’re doing good, asking questions. Keep doing that, and good luck.

I don’t do well in traditional semester college cuz adhd.

So, never went to college. Started in fast food, last job was 75k/ year tech job.

I took a lot of short term accredited programs. ROP certifications. LearnIT. Studied on my own to test MVP certifications for excel, PowerPoint, word. You can study on your own to take A+ certification exam. I took community college non credit classes about various applied arts.

So, I’d show up at job interviews with no traditional college degree, but a ton of certifications, short term classes, etc. They were fascinated by my diverse tech skills, it showed I had ambition. So I got a lot of jobs easily this way.

Also, try being a career temp for a while. If you prove you’ll show up for the gigs professionally, they’ll send you to more assignments . I did this for a decade, got phenomenal skillset, different industries , lot of diverse experience.

Borderline schizoaffective, psychotic features. Constantly questioning sanity. Reality often surreal. Dbt, cbt has helped the most. If I practice mindfulness, grounding exercises daily… when mind spirals, reality starts to explode, easier to come back, keeps me tethered.

Tho, once as kid, when I became convinced I might be a disembodied brain floating in a jar, started to seriously freak out. Came home in terrorized panic, flipping madly thru my bookshelf, and reading “summa theologica” finally made the panic stop.

Sometimes, when I’ve researched something and compiled a ton of useful information about a topic… wish there was a lemmy for that. Kind of the opposite of asklemmy.

I stare at the wall reciting pi over and over, while my body withers, mind untethered, consumed by a mathematical void.

Baba Brinkman does rap music about science, evolution.

Dunno why, but your comment reminded of this:

https://youtu.be/2oRlBmwKzy4?si=NIg2ELZBkRCm_HzO

“Now that’s what I call music” I’m embarrassed to say, I use those volumes a lot to keep in touch with younger generations, new music. Also, among the more popular torrents generally, so download fast.

I used to identify as Libertarianian. Resented taxes, overreaching, infiltrating my life, all about independence, don’t want to be interfered with.

Then I became homeless. Realized how the social services, ssi, Medicare are important. Sure there are lazy people, but also those who genuinely need help, who want to get back on their feet. Care a lot more now about wanting to live in a society that actually cares about the people in it.

Worked at a day center that cared for adults with developmental disabilities. Part of my job was picking up, dropping off clients, event trips, activities. In my 1st 3 months there, I saw:

Coworker parked bus, pushed wheelchair client onto lift, walked away to smoke a cig. Client and wheelchair 10 feet off pavement, not tied down.

Some staff had to clean, change diapers. They would grab clients, throw them down, rip diapers off, spray lysol on their genitals.

In parking lot, coming back from trip, coworker shoved client so hard he fell face first into asphalt, bleeding, tooth chipped.

I could go on.

I tried talking with manager several times. She didn’t care. I really needed the money, but couldn’t stomach it, called adult protective services, who came out, and they got in serious trouble, shut down temporarily, manager fired, fines, etc. Lost the job, but don’t regret it.

A week’s nothing. Think my top score was 3 months with absolutely no sleep. Lifelong insomnia ftw.

Edit. Meant to say 1 month with no sleep. Don’t think 3 months no sleep is physically possible. I can last maybe 3 to 4 months of just 1 to 2 hours sleep a night, before complete collapse.

Was in a hotel. Hadn’t slept in a week. Woke up, leaned over to get out of bed. Still asleep, slipped crashed hard into sharp bed table corner. Even asleep, quick reflexes meant I didn’t cave my skull in. Instead, I found myself in a ball on the floor, my arm split open , entire forearm blue black and purple, gushing blood. Still have a scar from it 2 years later.

I change laptops frequently. Used to buy songs from iTunes and every time I changed laptops, transferred music over, I’d lose access to them. Would have to go thru insane process to be allowed to listen to the music I’d paid for.

Similar thing would happen with some software, Adobe especially.

If you’re going to treat me like a criminal, then I might as well be a criminal. Same with purchasing movies on Amazon.

I tried to pay for minecraft, but 2 hours later, Microsoft wouldn’t let me. Kept trying to make me an Hotmail account.

Growing trend in software I’m not happy with. No longer allowed to own the things we buy, and forced to hand over my email, phone number, address, name, create account… used to be, you could just buy things, simply. That was that.

Corporations are getting drunk with power, overreaching, infiltrating people life.

Also, if in poverty, no food, homeless, etc. If I can’t afford what I need. And can get it another way, I will